Nation's Girlfriends Unveil New Economic Plan: 'Let's Move In Together'
/r/TheOnion
"Obama Scales Back Goals For America After Visiting Denny's"
/r/TheOnion
Teen's Death Hits Reporter Hard
/r/TheOnion
A shocking new study that asked teen boys about their sexual habits reveals that they are all having sex all the time and are really, really good at having it.
/r/TheOnion
"I like the way the blood makes me feel!"
/r/TheOnion
Report: 95% Of Grandfathers Got Job By Walking Right Up And Just Asking
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Patriotic Teen Fails Spanish. “I’m American, I speak American.”
/r/TheOnion
Man Hasn’t Heard Or Read Single True Thing In 6 Years
/r/TheOnion
12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Offer To Give Breast Exams
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Is Our Wealth Hurting Africa's Feelings?
/r/TheOnion
New Anti-Smoking Ads Warn Teens 'It's Gay To Smoke'
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New United Ultra Economy Class Tickets Lets Passengers Get Dragged Behind Plane By Giant Rope
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White House Condems 2020 Election As Partisan Witch Hunt | The Onion Presents The Topical - March 3rd 2020
/r/TheOnion
The PS5 launch is rough
/r/TheOnion
Overwhelmed White Nationalist Militia Spread Too Thin Plotting Attacks Against Everyone Trump Wants
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Frustrated Political Scientist Patton Oswalt Attempts To Explain Gerrymandering Without Visual Aids
/r/TheOnion
After Obama Victory, Shrieking White-Hot Sphere Of Pure Rage Early GOP Front-Runner For 2016
/r/TheOnion
Kanye West on his election disaster (EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW)
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How To Avoid Unbearable Facebook Bullshit On Election Day
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"Biden admits he expected to be president by now" from headline ticker reel
/r/TheOnion
Paul Ryan Spending Final Day Of Campaign Reminding Homeless People They Did This To Themselves
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Health Experts Determine College Social Distancing Guidelines Still No Match For The Jasonator
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Is The Government Spying On Schizophrenics Enough?
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Scientists Discover Dangerous Link Between Book Learnin’, Back Talk
/r/TheOnion
Should Animals Have More Eyes?
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Piece Of Sh*t From Nearby Town Marries Bitch From High School
/r/TheOnion
Disney World On Lockdown After Mickey Escapes Enclosure, Rampages Through Park
/r/TheOnion